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| Danny | Ah, Nasty Burger. Our safe haven away from the worries of-[Cut off by Jazz entering dramatically through the duel doors.] |
|---|---|
| Jazz | Danny, Run! |
| Danny | Run, Why Should I? |
| Jack and Maddie | Dude! [The teen patrons gasp which turns to laughter directed at Danny and Jazz.] |
| Jazz (to Sam) | If anyone asks, I'm related to you. |
| Sam | Okay, but you're gonna have to be way less cheery. |
| Jack | We're like totally late for 80s night at the Material Grill. |
| Maddie | But you like totally forgot your wallet, man. |
| Danny | Uh, thanks. |
| Jack | Don't mention it. We love you, man. |
| Danny | (Crushed by Maddie's hug.) If I pass out, I give you permission to not resuscitate me. |
| Jack | Come on, Maddie. Let's crank up the tunes and moonwalk outta here. |
| Maddie | Oh, just liike our college days. [Oddly impressive moonwalking ensues.] |
| Sam | Cheer up, Danny. I'm sure there's a couple of kids who didn't see that. |
| Mikey | Oh, this one's goning straight to the internet! |
| Danny | [A little more than exasperated.] DAUH! |
| Sam and Tucker | Danny! Wait! |
| Danny | Just once, I'd like to know what it's like to live in a normal family. |
| Vlad | Which you never will, so long as you're Jack Fenton's son. |
| Danny | Great, more weirdness from my parents's college days. What do you want with me this time, Plasmius? |
| Vlad | Ah. The ecto-acne, it's back. Please help me. |
| The trio | [All gasp.] |
| Sam | Help you? Yeah, right. |
| Tucker | Why would he want to do that? |
| Vlad | I thought you'd never ask. [Gases Sam and Tucker, grabs Danny's leg to stop him from helping them and/or getting infected.] Help me find a cure or my fate is theirs. [Passes out. Sam and Tucker cough as the smoke clears away to reveal their faces marred with ecto-acne.] |
| [Guitar riff and transition into the opening sequence...] | |
| Sam and Tucker | [Screaming.] |
| Danny | Vlad, wake up. Tell me there's an antidote. Tell me you're bluffing. Tell me anything, just wake up! |
| Jack | Back off, ghost! [One blast from the ecto-foamer and a "Gah" from Danny later.] No one slaps around Jack Fenton's college pal. |
| Jazz | Danny! Must be around here somewhere. I'll go look for him. |
| Jack | [Maddie gasps.] Vladdy? You all right? |
| Jazz | Found him. |
| Danny | Thanks for finding me. |
| Jack | Whoa. |
| Maddie | We have an outbreak of ecto-acne. And there's only one place on Earth that knows how to treat ecto-acne. |
| Danny | Please say hospital. Please say hospital. please say hospital. [Transition to FentonWorks in quarantine] Why couldn't you say hospital? |
| Maddie | [Vlad grunts.] Hey, everyone, he's awake. |
| Vlad | Ah, Maddie, I knew you wouldn't let me down. It's almost like you didn't have a choice. [Danny growls and stomps off.] |
| Jack | Looking good, Vladdie! [Loud beeping from monitor showing his vitals decline.] Who am I kidding? You're a goner. |
| Tucker | What? I can't be a goner. I haven't even dated a cheerleader yet. |
| Sam | Trust me, you're never gonna live that long. [Tucker faints.] |
| Danny | There has to be something we can do for them. |
| Maddie | [Sighing.] I wish I could, Danny, but I still can't identify the ecto impurities that are causing the lethal acne. |
| Sam and Tucker | Lethal?! |
| Vlad | Ah, life is so unfair. And for you 2, growing shorter. |
| Danny | [Grabbing Vlad by the vest.] I swear, if they find a cure, I'm gonna make you wish they hadn't. |
| Vlad | [Unfazed.] Oh, good one. I swear I get chills when you get so dramatic, but if I were you, I'd focus more on saving your friends. [Tucker and Sam panting and shivering in behind them.] They're running out of time, you know. |
| Danny | Time? That gives me a great idea. [Transition to the Clockwork's lair in the Ghost Zone.] |
| Clockwork | No, it's a horrible idea. I'm the ghost of time, not the ghost of miracle cures. |
| Danny | Send me back in time to my parents's college days, Clockwork. I can prevent the accident that gave Vlad his original case of ecto-acne and his ghost powers. |
| Clockwork | Changing the past can have dire consequences. Are you willing to take that risk? |
| Danny | Please, Tucker and Sam are my best friends, and I don't have a choice. |
| Clockwork | You always have a choice, but since you insist on learning things the hard way [CW opens a portal and Danny floats in, giving him a final glance before doing so], try not to destroy the past. |
| Danny | 'Destroy the past?' What? And lose all this culture? |
| Student | Totally awesome outfit, dude. |
| Danny | Oh, great. I blend. Ah 'ell, guess it beats people thinking I'm a- [Looks at poster about the ghost portal, bell rings.] |
| Past Vlad | Maddie, there's something I've been wanting to tell you for a long time. |
| Past Maddie | One second, Vlad. Jack, do you remember to fill the filtrator with ecto-purifier? |
| Past Jack | On it, baby. [Pours diet cola inside instead as Danny gapes at the sight.] |
| Past Vlad | I'm telling you, Jack, it won't work. |
| Past Jack | Bogus, V-man, it totally will. This proto-portal is guaranteed to bust open the wall into the ghost dimension. |
| Past Maddie | Jack, these calculations aren't right. |
| Past Jack | Bonzai! [Chaos ensues, screaming as Danny saves Vlad from the beam.] |
| Past Vlad | [Pushing Maddie out of the way with him.] No! |
| Past Maddie | Vlad, you saved my life. |
| Past Vlad | Yes, I did, didn't I? |
| Danny | No ecto-acne, no Plasmius. Mission accomplished. |
| [Clockwork presses a button on his staff that sends Danny back to the present.] | |
| Danny | Whew, back home, and no quarentine tent either which means everyone's alright. [He sees the FentonWorks building lacking any of it's tech.] I think. [Switching back into Fenton, he barges in. The house looks like it had been ransacked or abandoned with pizza boxes littering the floors.] Uh, Mom? Dad? Jazz? Anyone? [The air catches in Danny's throat as he sees his father in a deceiving animation error as he should be in his 80s garb. Ecno-acne still covering his face.] |
| Jack | Nobody trespasses on Jack Fenton's property! |
| Danny | Dad! Relax! |
| Jack | 'Dad?' I don't have a son! I'm single, bitterly, bitterly single. |
| Danny | You are? Geez, that explains almost everything. |
| Jack | What!? |
| Danny | Nothing! Uh, is that ecto-acne? |
| Jack | It's a condition, that you shouldn't know about! How do you know about ecto-acne?! Talk! |
| Danny | I'm your son. I know all about the accident in Wisconsin years ago that shouldn't 'ave happened. |
| Jack | Oh, it happened alright. [Throws child down like a basketball.] And my life went straight down the flusher from that day on. [White halos appear and turn Jack Fenton into his unnamed ghost half. He shoots a blast a small teenager.] |
| Danny | Guh! Wait! It's me, Danny! Your son! [Dodges another blast.] |
| Jack | Lies! I do not have a son! Even if I did, I certainly wouldn't name him 'Danny.' That's dumb. |
| Danny | Okay, I didn't want to do this in front of you, but 'going ghost!' [Identical rings to Jack's form around his waist which change him into Phantom's form.] |
| Jack | You're a ghost? I hate ghosts! [He fires again at Danny.] Nn-rah! |
| Danny | I don't understand, that's got to be Dad. He aims like Dad. |
| Jack | If it wasn't for ghosts, I never would've lost the love of my life. [Classic Danny scream as he gets punted into the basement.] |
| Danny | Oh, this is bad. I've gotta get back to Clockwork and change this. [Gasp.] No portal? Okay? Maybe I can squeeze through this stupid thing? Oh, oh no. [A news clipping reads, "WISCONSIN DAIRY KING WEDS COLLEGE SWEETHEART."] I didn't destroy the past, I destroyed the present! [Comerical break.] 'Mr. and Mrs. Vlad Masters?' [Gasp!] |
| Jack | Say 'goodbye!' [He sees the news clipping and alll agression vanishes in him.] 'Goodbye.' [He takes it back from Danny.] Seems all I ever do is say 'goodbye.' |
| Danny | Dad, uh, Jack, please, just tell me what happened. I mean, I'd love ta here you blather on about the glory days. |
| Jack | Well, my cat, Jasmine, won't listen anymore. Anyway, it was twenty years ago... |
| Past Maddie | Vlad, you saved my life! |
| Past Vlad | Yes, I did, didn't I? [Maddie gasps and they lean in closer about to kiss.] |
| Past Jack | Bogus! I'm-I'm hideous. Hideous! [Vlad and Maddie gasp in unison. As Jack runs off hiding his face in his hands] |
| Jack | I may have lost Maddie that day, but I gained ghost powers and twenty-seven pounds. Anyway, after that I tried to find my place in the world. First as a ghost fighting superhero, but that didn't work out; then again, perhaps I shouldn't have debuted on Halloween. [Children laughing.] Eventually, I moved here, to continue my research on ghosts. [He phases into it, then the previous owner of home runs out terrified.] No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get rid of my ghost half, the half I knew Maddie would never be able to accept. |
| Danny | Oh, man. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. |
| Jack | What are you blathering about? [Danny shows Jack his wallet photos.] What? What is this? |
| Danny | Vlad wasn't supposed to marry Maddie, you were! I went back in time and changed one little moment in the past and messed up everything. [Jack growls with a shaking fist.] But I can fix it, I swear! I just need a working portal to- |
| Jack | [Duplicating his form into three.] More Lies! |
| Danny | [He gets thrown out of the building into a billboard, grunting he pushes himself up.] I have to get to the Ghost Zone and find Clockwork. [The Jacks are on the persuit, Danny goes invisible to avoid them.] And if Dad doesn't have a portal, that means I have to find Mom and hope she does. [Danny flies to Vlad's castle, shifting back to his human form he approaches the knocker exhausted. He knocks it a few times, Maddie and Vlad greet him at the door.] |
| Vlad | How many times do I have to tell you, 'No. Free. Cheese. Samples!' |
| Danny | [He falls to his knees.] Mom. |
| Maddie and Vlad | Mom?! |
| Scene change | |
| Maddie | We should call your parents. They must be worried sick. |
| Danny | My parents are sort of, uh, missing, [He took another bite of the cheese wedge.]' there was an accident. |
| Vlad | Oh, I'm so sorry, my boy. |
| Maddie | Is there anything we can do to help? Do you need a place to stay? |
| Vlad | Ah, your kindness knows no bounds, my love [Vlad puckers up.] |
| Danny | [Distressed by the display.] Ah-ha, listen, um, [He places a hand over Vlad's lips.] this might sound like a strange question, but, um, do you guys have a ghost portal by any chance? |
| Maddie | [Laughing to feign innocence.] Why would we have a silly thing like a ghost portal? [She clenches her jaw and fist as she averts her gaze.] |
| Vlad | Yes, I'm a simple dairy man, successor to the Wisconsin Dairy King, we do not discuss ghosts in. this. house! |
| Danny | Then why do you have an ecto-foamer? |
| Vlad | What's the meaning of this? |
| Maddie | Um, that's my- carpet foamer. It eliminates stains, not ghosts. Right, sweetie? |
| Vlad | Maddie, can you forgive me for doubting you? [They make out.] |
| Danny | [Wincing.] I thought my real parents were embarrassing, this is so much worse.' [At night, Danny goes ghost and searches for any sign of a portal.] Something's wrong here. Even if Mom was crazy enough to marry Vlad, there's no way she'd give up ghost hunting to become a milkmaid. [Diving through the ground.] I knew it! Now all I need is- Ye-yes! A portal! I can get back to Clockwork and- |
| Maddie | [There's a crash and Maddie descends from the ceiling, presumably she broke a hole through it to reach Danny faster.] Eat Maddie Weasel, ghost! |
| Danny | [Body blue as he gets sucked inside.] Wait! You don't understand! [Danny groans as he returns to consciousness.] |
| Maddie | Oh, you're awake. Good, I have some questions for you. Let's start with 'who are you' and 'why are you snooping around my secret lab?' |
| Danny | Wait, what are you doing!? [The laser fires a fine green light of energized particles, the beam gets close to his arm pit.] Stop! |
| Maddie | Oh, scream all you want, ghost. This lab is totally sound proof; it has to be or my husband would find out about it. Now, I ask you again: 'Who are you?' |
| Danny | I'm- your son. [Maddie gasps.] Yours and Jack Fenton's. |
| Maddie | Liar! I haven't seen Jack Fenton in years. He blamed me for the accident that gave him his powers, Vlad told me so; he ran away here to escape his ghostly wrath. |
| Danny | What? That's insane! He's still totally in love with you. |
| Jack | [Phasing in from the ceiling.] It's true, Maddie. It's always been true. |
| Maddie | Jack? But Vlad told me you never wanted to see me again? |
| Jack | [Stepping forward to close the gap between them.] I never stopped wanting to see you, Maddie; I just couldn't face you as the thing you despise, [He changed back to his human half.] a ghost. But I had to come, because of this. [He held Danny's photos of their family so she could see it. She takes it from him.] |
| Maddie | A family? [A tear slides down from inside her goggles.] With you? [She hugs him, after a moment he hugs her back.] Oh, Jack, And that's why you called me 'Mom' at the door, you must be our son from an alternate timeline. [Jack and her give Danny a hug.] |
| Danny | The one good thing about having scientist parents- alternate timeline- totally valid excuse. |
| Jack | So, where's our little alternate timeline daughter, Davy? |
| Danny | It's Danny. |
| Jack | That's still dumb. |
| Danny | Eh, [Chuckling.] that's a little complicated. |
| Maddie | Clockwork, right? [She typed at her console. His description pops up almost immediately.] |
| Danny | Wow, you're good. |
| Maddie | You don't really think I spend my nights coming up with new cheese recipes, do you? |
| Jack | Oh, Maddie, just think, in another universe we have two kids to embarrass. |
| Vlad | Let's focus on what you're doing in this universe, shall we? [Danny's parents gasp upon seeing Vlad fire at their temporally displaced child.] I knew this wasn't a carpet foamer. You've been experimenting again. |
| Maddie | Vlad, it's not what you think. |
| Jack | No, Maddie, It's exactly what he thinks. You and I are destined to be together, and nothing will keep us apart any longer. |
| Vlad | Nothing, except this! [Jack is stuck to the wall due to the ecto-foamer.] |
| Danny | Leave him alone. [There's a look of genuine fear in Vlad's eyes when Danny fires at him, it's visible for less than a second. As Danny dodges, a stray blast sends Maddie flying into the console.] |
| Vlad | Sorry, sweetheart, my bad. |
| Danny | Mom! [He charges a shot directly at the tip of the foamer.] |
| Vlad | Don't you ever call her that again! [Danny is shot into the operating table and the shackles automatically trap him there.] You have overstayed your welcome. Now, you're going to have to leave molecule by molecule. [He turns on the laser Maddie had been using earlier.] |
| Danny | Wait! [His voice gets louder as the beam neared his limbs.] No! You don't understand! None of this should be happening! |
| Vlad | You think I care? I like it this way! [Jack shoves Vlad out of view.] |
| Jack | Get away from my son! [He shuts off the laser before Vlad pushes him and grabs the manual tip that Maddie was holding prior. Vlad fires at Jack and he retaliates by making a bubble shield around him. The laser sends him careening into the portal frame. The emergency light bulb flashed as a warning sound dinged and donged. As the smoke cleared, a human Jack sat on his knees panting,] |
| Maddie | Jack. |
| Jack | It's alright, Maddie. Just remember what could've been. [He lets out a breath as he collapses into unconsciousness.] |
| Maddie | You despicable, lying piece of cheese! I wasted the best years of my life with you! |
| Vlad | Now, Maddie, I may be a lying piece of cheese, but I'm still your husband. [Maddie carries him above her head.] |
| Maddie | Consider this an annulment! |
| Vlad | [Punted into the Ghost Zone, he's face-to-face with various malicious ghosts. He weakly waves as they snarl at him.] Oh, hello. Have I mentioned how much I love ghosts? No! [He is presumably assaulted and/or murdered soon after this exchange.] |
| Maddie | Quick, the portal's overloading. [She uncuffs Danny} Go back in time and make sure this never happens, Clockwork will help. [Danny books it before the portal explodes.] |
| Clockwork | I will not help. |
| Danny | But- Sam, Tucker- |
| Clockwork | Need to be cured in the present, not the past. I can reset time to back to way it was before you meddled, but that's it. [The screen displays Past Maddie talking to Jack.] |
| Past Maddie | Jack, do you remember to fill the filtrator with ecto-purifier? |
| Past Jack | On it, baby. [Pours diet cola.] |
| Danny | That's it. That's it! [Clockwork smiles as Danny flies off to his family, Vlad and friends.] |
| Jack | Live, Vladdie, live! [His attention shifts to Sam.] Oh, and you too. |
| Sam | You know what this means for us, |
| Tucker | No cheerleaders? |
| Sam | No fifteenth birthday party. When you see Danny, tell him- |
| Danny | Why don't you tell me yourself? |
| Maddie | [Gasp.] Put on your protective gear, you don't wanna catch the ecto-acne! |
| Danny | Uh, yeah, about that. those ecto-impurities you couldn't identify, um, would they be consistent with, oh, say, diet cola. |
| Maddie | Don't be silly, why would- [Gasp.] Oh my. [A short sequence of her brewing up an antidote plays.] |
| Jack | Vladdie, you're cured! |
| Vlad | That's great, Jack. Now, would you please stop pounding on my chest! |
| Jack | Sorry, diet soda? [He offers while holding the ecto-purifier.] |
| Maddie | Danny? How did you know? |
| Danny | There had to be some benefits to being the son of the two smartest ghost hunters on the planet. |
| Vlad | [The moment his parent walk away, Vlad speaks up.] I knew you'd come through, Daniel. All it took was the proper motivation, of course I'm still weak beyond measure, so bygones? [He shouts in alarm as he's punched to Wisconsin.] |
| Danny | Bygones. [Transition to the Material Grill exterior.] |
| Maddie | We finally got our 80s night out. [They chat while dancing in their 80s attire.] |
| Jack | It's too bad Vladdie had to fly back to Wisconsin so suddenly, he'd 'ave loved this place. Right, Danny? |
| Danny | Gnarly! [He moonwalks with his parents content.] |
| Jazz | If anyone asks, I was adopted. |
| Danny | Let's just say I've come to terms with Mom and Dad's past. I wouldn't change it again, even if I could. |
| Mikey | Forget the internet, this is going on pay-per-view! |
| End |